Babies

Congratulations on your baby's low birth weight!

If you ever try to find me or our child, I will not hesitate to call the police.

I don't want to put pressure on you, but if we don't have a boy, I am going to be very disappointed.

Congratulations on the birth of your child! We'll need a capable workforce to pay down our crushing national deficit.

Maybe your miscarriage is a sign that you shouldn't reproduce.

Maybe your child is not autistic. Perhaps they're just escaping into a world of wonder and magic.

You are like the soil: fertile, dirty, and able to swallow anything I put into it.

... In 9 month's time we will never again enjoy romantic moments alone.

You decided to keep it!

... you need to spend more time at home!

We think it's great that you're having a baby, but ...

We are concerned that you are starving your unborn child ...

Please read your medical coverage carefully ...

My secretary tells me this pregnancy has been a little difficult.

Maybe you should take it easy on the high risk leisure activities ...

You can't keep running from your biological clock.